Therapy Stinks

Two weird, almost synesthesic, experiences since I last posted.

The first came after I'd been pondering whether or not I should try and get some more therapy/counselling to see if I can lay some demons to rest once and for all. I'd just finished watching something on TV, and as I deleted the recording I caught a snippet of another show which showed a woman standing at the door at some kind of therapy centre thinking about going in. The camera showed the corridor, and those chairs that are so typical of NHS therapy. Sort of deep, low, wooden with horrible scratchy but oh-so-practical material on them. And I got a massive rush of the smell of therapy. I have no idea what it is. Some sort of cleaning product that the NHS reserve for these departments? It has an edge of plasticine about it, and is completely different from the smell of a medical ward, or even a psychiatric ward (the latter all have different smells, from my experience over the years).

The other thing was closing the curtains, at the window where my huge money maker (tomato) plant sits, and getting a rush of the smell of my mum and dad's green house. This is easier to identify - it is, of course, the smell of tomato plants. Not a nice smell, exactly, but nice because of what it represents (in the same way that the therapy smell isn't so bad, but of course has grim associations). I'm not sure why the tomato plant smell is quite so Proustian, the greenhouse came with the house we moved into when I was 7, and I swear my parents never planted and cared for a single thing in there - just cropped the plants already established, until they died. But the smell of the greenhouse has obviously lodged somewhere, ready to leap out at me.

Still no practice, and none of my exercises either. For the past couple of days I've had a bad stomach, and the thought of using the bandha makes me feel a bit queasy. As does eating. Or walking upright. I'm not sure what's caused it - I thought maybe my stomach reacting to a bad diet and lack of sleep, but now I have the post viral rash I always get after a cold, so I guess maybe it's a mild virus after all.

Reason to be cheerful - if I'm up to it tonight (aka, if I can cope with up to 90 minutes with no access to the bathroom) then I'm going to see the Hitchhikers Guide to the Galaxy theatre radio show. If there is no one there who has quite conspicuously remembered to bring their towel, I'll be very disappointed.

One more thing - giant beans are cooking as I type.