Sunday - nada.
Monday - hours class, lovely
Tuesday - nada
Wednesday - hours class, lovely
Thursday - 45min DVD, lovely
Friday - hours class, lovely
The word lovely is pretty much a meme to my friends and family and I (yes, I know all words are memes to everyone, strictly speaking, but you get my point). Just to point out that the overuse is endemic in my life.
Finally on Friday I felt a bit fitter, recently even those 3A and 3Bs at the beginning have been heavy going. I have high hopes for keeping a good practice over the weekend. Although I'm very busy, I'll have my early mornings to myself.
Saturday, 25 May 2013
Sunday, 19 May 2013
practice week
Sunday - half primary, alternate vinyasa. Grim. Not sure why.
Monday - nada
Tuesday - nada
Wednesday - hours class, lovely
Thursday - 30min DVD, lovely
Friday - hours class, meh
Had big plans for this morning. But then I accidentally got very, very, very, very drunk last night.
Oof.
Wednesday, 15 May 2013
mindful eating update
I can't remember when I decided I needed to focus more on mindful eating, with a view to being healthier, tackling the GERD, and avoiding further weight gain. I could look but clearly, I can't be bothered.
Anyway, it's going well. After the initial ego-depletion inspired rebellion (I will eat ALL THE THINGS!) I'm really enjoying it. I enjoy the impact it has on my life. I enjoy sitting quietly at my kitchen table with my meal. I enjoy cooking for people who appreciate it - even if the person who appreciates it is, in fact, me. I feel like I've rediscovered food.
Finally, to see if it helps the GERD, I'm reducing the amount of wheat in my diet. I have meant to try this for ages but have put it off and put it off. A vegan doesn't really need any more dietary restrictions unless they really and truly do improve their quality of life, and I've never noticed a direct link (as I have with very spicy or oily foods, or raw tomato or onion). I have no plans to cut it out entirely, but as I eat up the wheat pasta, the wheat flour, the wheat based breakfast cereals, they're all being replaced with wheat free stuff.
This afternoon, I found my GERD medication, still in its pot in my bag. I had forgotten to take it until the afternoon! This is fantastic. Normally I would be gasping in pain by that time without my daily dose. I have some of the symptoms that go with taking it late, but they are really, really reduced.
So who knows if it's coincidence or not. And who cares - I'll take it for what it is.
Anyway, it's going well. After the initial ego-depletion inspired rebellion (I will eat ALL THE THINGS!) I'm really enjoying it. I enjoy the impact it has on my life. I enjoy sitting quietly at my kitchen table with my meal. I enjoy cooking for people who appreciate it - even if the person who appreciates it is, in fact, me. I feel like I've rediscovered food.
Finally, to see if it helps the GERD, I'm reducing the amount of wheat in my diet. I have meant to try this for ages but have put it off and put it off. A vegan doesn't really need any more dietary restrictions unless they really and truly do improve their quality of life, and I've never noticed a direct link (as I have with very spicy or oily foods, or raw tomato or onion). I have no plans to cut it out entirely, but as I eat up the wheat pasta, the wheat flour, the wheat based breakfast cereals, they're all being replaced with wheat free stuff.
This afternoon, I found my GERD medication, still in its pot in my bag. I had forgotten to take it until the afternoon! This is fantastic. Normally I would be gasping in pain by that time without my daily dose. I have some of the symptoms that go with taking it late, but they are really, really reduced.
So who knows if it's coincidence or not. And who cares - I'll take it for what it is.
Friday, 10 May 2013
my practice week
Sunday - nada
Monday - nada
Tuesday - nada
Wednesday - hour long class
Thursday - 30min DVD
Friday - hour long class
Man I ached this morning.
Now can anyone spot why that might be . . . .
Monday - nada
Tuesday - nada
Wednesday - hour long class
Thursday - 30min DVD
Friday - hour long class
Man I ached this morning.
Now can anyone spot why that might be . . . .
Wednesday, 1 May 2013
(not) getting to class
Too much work to do to go to early classes, too much sleep to catch up on to go to later classes.
Feeling so unfit right now. Not even swimming.
Please, if I can ask one thing of all students reading this, when you get feedback - read it, listen to it, take it on board. We put a lot of time and effort into that feedback. And it keeps us from our yoga classes!
Feeling so unfit right now. Not even swimming.
Please, if I can ask one thing of all students reading this, when you get feedback - read it, listen to it, take it on board. We put a lot of time and effort into that feedback. And it keeps us from our yoga classes!
Sunday, 14 April 2013
I dd some practice.
But Ragdoll, I don't hear you cry as this is the internet and seriously you've got more important things to fret about, why do you so rarely blog about actual Ashtanga yoga, even the asana stuff which any decent yoga snob knows isn't the real thing but it's as close as you get?
Well, my imaginary friends, it's because I so rarely actually do practice an actuals Ashtanga yoga, even the asana etc etc.
Three days this week I put my kit in the car, and drove to work with it hoping to go to class in the evening, and then two days I realised as the afternoon drifted on that the GERD just wasn't going to let me - the headache, the nausea, the shakes, the feeling starving hungry and crazy full at the same time. And the tiredness! It makes me want to sleep and sleep and sleep and sleep. I've never known what that's about, but wonder if it's just a result of the disturbed sleep I get. Not that I'm aware of it, but I tend to wake up in pain lately so that does suggest sleep quality won't have been at 100%.
Anyway, on the third of the three putting-the-kit-in-the-car days, I did make it to an hours class, and it was good. Similarly, I went to a workshop yesterday, focusing on backbending and that was good too.
And this morning I did one of my 'OK, what do I fancy?' practices - skipped some surya, the Parsvakonasanas, some of the fancier balancing, Utkutasana and the warriors, then did all of seated up to Navasana, though only alternate vinyasa. And only three Navasana.
Basically, I really fancied doing the Marichyasanas and had to do everything else to get there. Then, it seemed particularly churlish not to get my Navasana on.
Stomach feels - whisper it - much better now than it did this time last week. And that felt better than that time the week before and so on. For quite a while now I think back as I type this. Really hoping that's it for a while now.
Well, my imaginary friends, it's because I so rarely actually do practice an actuals Ashtanga yoga, even the asana etc etc.
Three days this week I put my kit in the car, and drove to work with it hoping to go to class in the evening, and then two days I realised as the afternoon drifted on that the GERD just wasn't going to let me - the headache, the nausea, the shakes, the feeling starving hungry and crazy full at the same time. And the tiredness! It makes me want to sleep and sleep and sleep and sleep. I've never known what that's about, but wonder if it's just a result of the disturbed sleep I get. Not that I'm aware of it, but I tend to wake up in pain lately so that does suggest sleep quality won't have been at 100%.
Anyway, on the third of the three putting-the-kit-in-the-car days, I did make it to an hours class, and it was good. Similarly, I went to a workshop yesterday, focusing on backbending and that was good too.
And this morning I did one of my 'OK, what do I fancy?' practices - skipped some surya, the Parsvakonasanas, some of the fancier balancing, Utkutasana and the warriors, then did all of seated up to Navasana, though only alternate vinyasa. And only three Navasana.
Basically, I really fancied doing the Marichyasanas and had to do everything else to get there. Then, it seemed particularly churlish not to get my Navasana on.
Stomach feels - whisper it - much better now than it did this time last week. And that felt better than that time the week before and so on. For quite a while now I think back as I type this. Really hoping that's it for a while now.
Tuesday, 9 April 2013
Probably don't read this.
Disclaimer - don't read this if you don't want to read about the sheer dullness of someone tying to lose weight. Also, maybe don't read this if you do want to read about that, as most people who actively choose to read about such gubbins usually don't have the healthiest relationships with food and their own body, and I don't want to be an enabler. Also, definitely don't read this if you have any kind of sympathy with the sheer mentalism of the people who got that biology teacher into trouble for using the word vagina. I don't do 'lady's holiday', I do menstruation. Actually, I don't even do that as I've been on the pill forever but anyway, you get my point.
So, I went to the nurse for my smear test this morning (I'm assuming this is called the same all around the english speaking world, otherwise some of you are wondering WTF the NHS is up to). Seeing the nurse for this every three years is the one time that I get to find out my body weight. As an aside, I love my nurse. She's the best. She shares my (obviously fantastic) sense of humour and we always end up getting the giggles. I'd be trying to wrangle a friendship if it wasn't the fact that I still feel weird enough socialising with the woman who examined my PhD, let alone with a woman who routinely examines my vagina.
Anyway.
Turns out, I've put on a stone in the three years since I saw her (haven't had a smear in the past three to five years? GO GET ONE. Unless you're a bloke. In which case maybe check your testicles & breast tissue instead. Or someone else's, obviously. Please get permission.)
OK, not actually a stone, apparently 6kg, which is more like 12lb than the full stone, but if you have a bit of a think about the fact that I find that 12lb uncomfortable and would rather it was a nice round 14lb = one stone, you might see why it is that I don't weigh myself. I am a bit numbery. NB not a technical term.
If I were to weigh myself more often I strongly suspect I'd find myself aiming for nice round numbers, whether up or down, whether healthy of frankly bonkers. 24 stone would be great, dividing by 1, 2, 3, 4, 6, 8, 12, and 24. Not so great health-wise, I can acknowledge that, but such lovely numbers! Counting calories would involve making sure that I ate exactly 1 x 2 x 3 x 4 x 5 x 6 x 7 = 5,040 calories a day. Or maybe 1,440 calories, as that divides by 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 8, 9, 10, 12, 15, 16, 18, 20, 24, 36, 72, 80, 90, 96, 120, 160, 180, 240, 288, 360, 480, 720 and, of course 1,440. I might have missed some there, as I've not bothered to work them out. I mean, I'm not OBSESSIVE or anything.
Anyway. If I put on a stone every three years for the rest of my life I'd be 10 stone heavier by the time I died. I almost said '15 if I live that long' but I think we can assume, in a not-at-all-melodramatic sort of a way that if I do keep putting so much weight on then I'll not be living to such a ripe old age. I will DIE of weight gain related complications before I reach the age my parents are currently at. Or, you know, I won't, but I'm not currently in the mood to let boring old facts and probabilities get in the way of a good rant.
So I need to stop putting on weight. Even without the made up possibility of putting on that stone every three years, it's still not looking good. It would be best to lose some - I am overweight, by any measure. Not obese, by any measure (except certain sections of the media), but definitely overweight. I'd noticed in the past few weeks, but it's hard to be sure when your mind plays tricks on you. As does your body - the GERD makes my tummy huge some days, so my clothes can feel tight even when there's no more or less body fat than before.
Also, I had a dream that my yoga leggings didn't fit, which is clearly the universe's way of telling me something my mind's way of coming up with a post-hoc rationalisation of the brain activity that occurred as I was waking up. And therefore an indication that it was on my unconscious/third system mind.
I'm not sure how to do this, but it's going to happen.
There will be mindfulness.
There will be being rude to people who try to encourage me to eat/drink when I'm not hungry/thirsty. And then apologising. And then doing it again the next time. And probably the next, until I get the hand of being more gracious.
There will be randomly eating lots of food that my body doesn't need as my poor depleted ego cracks under the pressure (google 'ego depletion', it's fascinating).
There will be mindfulness.
There will be stocking up on lovely fresh fruit and veg.
There will be contributions to planet destruction as I eat what I am hungry for, and not what is available in season and grown under organic conditions.
There will not be talking about it. People who talk about weightloss and food choices for reasons of weight-loss or control are dull, dull people.
There will not be depriving myself of cake/chocolate/white bread/whatever when I just plain want to eat cake/chocolate/white bread/whatever. My body is pretty reliable in telling me what it wants/needs when I actually manage to listen to it.
There will be eating what I truly want, when I truly want it.
There will not be self-medication of my GERD through food.
There will be eating (and sleeping) as well and as regularly as possible.
There will be self-medication of my GERD through actual medication, at least in those times when mindfulness and being all zen and shit just isn't enough.
There will not be weighing myself, calorie counting or otherwise indulgence of any numbers related mentalism.
There will be planning and organising availability of (vegan) food and not getting caught out feeling too hungry to think straight and ending up eating six slices of bread for dinner because the thought of cooking something makes me want to cry. Ahem.
There will be patience. OK, OK, of course their won't be. There will be massive impatience and frustration and a strong urge to weigh, and measure, and have quantifiable evidence of progress.
And ultimately, there will be a reduction in my body fat. There will be my lovely nurse looking at the scales in three years time and saying that I've lost weight and starting to say well done, then stopping to check I've done it healthily, then finishing saying well done in that case. Then making a joke about putting the speculum on the radiator to warm it up, and would I like a cup of tea while she admires my cervix?
I hope you didn't read this. Go away now.
So, I went to the nurse for my smear test this morning (I'm assuming this is called the same all around the english speaking world, otherwise some of you are wondering WTF the NHS is up to). Seeing the nurse for this every three years is the one time that I get to find out my body weight. As an aside, I love my nurse. She's the best. She shares my (obviously fantastic) sense of humour and we always end up getting the giggles. I'd be trying to wrangle a friendship if it wasn't the fact that I still feel weird enough socialising with the woman who examined my PhD, let alone with a woman who routinely examines my vagina.
Anyway.
Turns out, I've put on a stone in the three years since I saw her (haven't had a smear in the past three to five years? GO GET ONE. Unless you're a bloke. In which case maybe check your testicles & breast tissue instead. Or someone else's, obviously. Please get permission.)
OK, not actually a stone, apparently 6kg, which is more like 12lb than the full stone, but if you have a bit of a think about the fact that I find that 12lb uncomfortable and would rather it was a nice round 14lb = one stone, you might see why it is that I don't weigh myself. I am a bit numbery. NB not a technical term.
If I were to weigh myself more often I strongly suspect I'd find myself aiming for nice round numbers, whether up or down, whether healthy of frankly bonkers. 24 stone would be great, dividing by 1, 2, 3, 4, 6, 8, 12, and 24. Not so great health-wise, I can acknowledge that, but such lovely numbers! Counting calories would involve making sure that I ate exactly 1 x 2 x 3 x 4 x 5 x 6 x 7 = 5,040 calories a day. Or maybe 1,440 calories, as that divides by 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 8, 9, 10, 12, 15, 16, 18, 20, 24, 36, 72, 80, 90, 96, 120, 160, 180, 240, 288, 360, 480, 720 and, of course 1,440. I might have missed some there, as I've not bothered to work them out. I mean, I'm not OBSESSIVE or anything.
Anyway. If I put on a stone every three years for the rest of my life I'd be 10 stone heavier by the time I died. I almost said '15 if I live that long' but I think we can assume, in a not-at-all-melodramatic sort of a way that if I do keep putting so much weight on then I'll not be living to such a ripe old age. I will DIE of weight gain related complications before I reach the age my parents are currently at. Or, you know, I won't, but I'm not currently in the mood to let boring old facts and probabilities get in the way of a good rant.
So I need to stop putting on weight. Even without the made up possibility of putting on that stone every three years, it's still not looking good. It would be best to lose some - I am overweight, by any measure. Not obese, by any measure (except certain sections of the media), but definitely overweight. I'd noticed in the past few weeks, but it's hard to be sure when your mind plays tricks on you. As does your body - the GERD makes my tummy huge some days, so my clothes can feel tight even when there's no more or less body fat than before.
Also, I had a dream that my yoga leggings didn't fit, which is clearly
I'm not sure how to do this, but it's going to happen.
There will be mindfulness.
There will be being rude to people who try to encourage me to eat/drink when I'm not hungry/thirsty. And then apologising. And then doing it again the next time. And probably the next, until I get the hand of being more gracious.
There will be randomly eating lots of food that my body doesn't need as my poor depleted ego cracks under the pressure (google 'ego depletion', it's fascinating).
There will be mindfulness.
There will be stocking up on lovely fresh fruit and veg.
There will be contributions to planet destruction as I eat what I am hungry for, and not what is available in season and grown under organic conditions.
There will not be talking about it. People who talk about weightloss and food choices for reasons of weight-loss or control are dull, dull people.
There will not be depriving myself of cake/chocolate/white bread/whatever when I just plain want to eat cake/chocolate/white bread/whatever. My body is pretty reliable in telling me what it wants/needs when I actually manage to listen to it.
There will be eating what I truly want, when I truly want it.
There will not be self-medication of my GERD through food.
There will be eating (and sleeping) as well and as regularly as possible.
There will be self-medication of my GERD through actual medication, at least in those times when mindfulness and being all zen and shit just isn't enough.
There will not be weighing myself, calorie counting or otherwise indulgence of any numbers related mentalism.
There will be planning and organising availability of (vegan) food and not getting caught out feeling too hungry to think straight and ending up eating six slices of bread for dinner because the thought of cooking something makes me want to cry. Ahem.
There will be patience. OK, OK, of course their won't be. There will be massive impatience and frustration and a strong urge to weigh, and measure, and have quantifiable evidence of progress.
And ultimately, there will be a reduction in my body fat. There will be my lovely nurse looking at the scales in three years time and saying that I've lost weight and starting to say well done, then stopping to check I've done it healthily, then finishing saying well done in that case. Then making a joke about putting the speculum on the radiator to warm it up, and would I like a cup of tea while she admires my cervix?
I hope you didn't read this. Go away now.
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